Surrender- To give up possession to, to yield, to resign.
You know the song~ All to Jesus, I surrender. All to HIM I freely give. Worldly pleasures all forsaken.... I surrender all.....
Ive been thinking of this all morning.And Ive asked myself over and over. God what do you want me to surrender? What am I not surrendering to you? Or better yet have I surrendered anything to you?
I would say that I have surrendered my life to you. At 21 years old I finally surrendered and let you be LORD. And since that moment you have changed me. I am a new creation. I'm not who I was in high school. I'm not the same lost person I was at 20. I'm not even the same as when I first became a follower of Jesus Christ. I have grown spiritually. But I have so much growing to do. I get embarrassed at how little I know sometimes. But i desire to grow closer to my LORD. So back to that question. Have I given up anything really? Are we really to give up everything? Is GOD asking me to surrender something specific, right now? I have some studying and reflecting to do today.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Friday, June 22, 2012
Confession Number TWO
Galatians 5 is full of good but convicting verses. 5:22 tells us the fruits of the Spirit.( what a saved by grace Christian should look like). We should be loving , joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good, faithful, gentle and self-controlled. Okay I am none of these. I think about how I am with my children. I am a stay at home mom of 2 boys (18 months apart) and one of those has had a few more special needs than the other.I frequently get frustrated. I am loving towards them most of the time. I am joyful some of the time. I want to create a peaceful home for Chris and the boys but that fails the minute I get frustrated. I am not kind until Ive had my morning coffee. I am never patient it seems. Im only gentle and self-controlled until once again Isaac pulls those hearing aids out or they start fighting with one another while Im on Facebook. I read a friends (Traci) blog about this the other day and it stuck with me. Then I read Galatians 5:16. It says to walk by the Spirit and you will not carry out the desire of the flesh. Notice it doesnt say "desires". Its not plural. I wondered why its only one desire. Then I thought about myself. Anytime Im not walking by the Spirit is when Im being selfish. Wanting to do what I want to do. Spend my time how I want to spend my time. A light bulb went off. I have read this many times but connecting these 2 verses was really convicting. I dont posses the fruits of the Spirit all of the time because I am not walking by the Spirit all of the time. So I asked myself "How can I walk by the Spirit all day everyday?" I have to stay in constant prayer and constant study of HIS word. As a mom I cant sit and read the BIBLE all day. But I can memorize verses to carry with me throughout the day. On my refrigerator I have the verse "serve the Lord with gladness". So that when i finally get sit down for the afternoon and Ezra ask me for something to eat (10 minutes after lunch) I will go to the fridge and see that verse. It reminds me that whatever I do, do out of obedience to GOD. I definitely need to memorize more verses to help me walk by the Spirit. I have got to let the Holy Spirit take control. Thats the only way I will ever be loving, joyful, peaceful, patient, kind, good,faithful , gentle and self-controlled.
If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit! (Gal. 5:25)
If we live by the Spirit, let us also walk by the Spirit! (Gal. 5:25)
Confession Number ONE
"No solider in active service entangles himself in the affairs of everyday life, so that he may please the one who enlisted him as a solider." This may not be a famous quote to most of us but it is a great statement that Paul made in 2 Timothy 2:4. I have never noticed it before. It really applies to my life right now. I keep thinking how I need to take a step back from some "affairs of everyday life." Facebook takes up time that could be spent reading to my boys. Morning news takes up time that could be spent in my quiet time with GOD. We as Christians are soldiers right? Soldiers trying to make a difference in the kingdom of GOD. Soldiers that are living in a place thats not our home. Sound familiar?. Our American soldiers live in a foreign place trying to make a difference in a country thats not their home. If our American soldiers spent their time watching television and staying on Facebook they wouldnt be very effective. Neither am I in my Christian walk if thats how I spend my time. How can I be effective? I need to dig into GODs word and study to find out more of who HE is. I need to have quiet time with HIM at some point in my busy day. And pray all day during my busy day. I want to please the ONE who enlisted me as HIS solider. And I cant please HIM if I dont spend time with HIM and reach out to those who need HIM.
Friday, April 20, 2012
Not our Home
Titus 2:11-14 says "For the Grace of God that brings salvation has appeared to all men, teaching us that, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, we should live soberly, righteously, and godly in the present age, looking for the Blessed Hope and glorious appearing of our GREAT GOD AND SAVIOR JESUS CHRIST, who gave himself for us, that HE might redeem us from every lawless deed and purify for Himself HIS own special people, zealous for good works,
In my devotion this morning (Blessing by Laura Story) she says "There is joy to be found in this life through Jesus Christ; yet He will not let our joy be complete here on this earth. Any sense of wholeness we feel is simply an appetizer. Any display of splendor on this earth is simply the opening act for His 'glorious appearing' "
Last night at our bible study i kept thinking about the verse from psalm 30:5 where it says that "joy will come in the morning". Going through a deep valley the last few months has been really tough. I learned that there is no valley to deep that God's light cannot reach. I'm not the same person i was a few months ago. That's a little scary. I feel scarred. But GOD never left me. I have felt closer to HIM than ever before. And I know its because He has carried me. I still have joy but its not complete. In this devotion she asks " is it possible that GOD leaves an ache in my soul to remind me that this is not my home. Does HE leave that tinge there to impassion me to tell others about that hope?"
I keep contemplating why GOD would allow me to lose two babies in 5 months.Why He would allow such pain? I know we are not promised a "safe life". We are not promised to always be on the mountain top. But we are promised by the Creator of the universe that Joy will come in the morning. My morning want be on this earth. But my Joy will be made complete the day I meet Jesus face to face. You see, this is not our home. And praise GOD that I have a Savior that loves me enough to go and prepare a place for me.(John14:2-3) And will one day come again to take me home to HIM and my two babies. She says " This is our blessed hope: that we are HIS and will someday spend eternity with HIM. Until then, we are strangers and foreigners, left with scars and limps, and all the other subtle reminders of that sweet truth: we are not home."
C.S Lewis says "If I find myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." Ive never felt so different and so out of place and so loved all at the same time.But I know now its GOD reminding me that this is not my home. So now when my days feel like a battle and I'm feeling the effects of my scars i will be reminded that this is not my home.
I cannot fathom whats waiting for me in heaven but i so look forward to finding out.
In my devotion this morning (Blessing by Laura Story) she says "There is joy to be found in this life through Jesus Christ; yet He will not let our joy be complete here on this earth. Any sense of wholeness we feel is simply an appetizer. Any display of splendor on this earth is simply the opening act for His 'glorious appearing' "
Last night at our bible study i kept thinking about the verse from psalm 30:5 where it says that "joy will come in the morning". Going through a deep valley the last few months has been really tough. I learned that there is no valley to deep that God's light cannot reach. I'm not the same person i was a few months ago. That's a little scary. I feel scarred. But GOD never left me. I have felt closer to HIM than ever before. And I know its because He has carried me. I still have joy but its not complete. In this devotion she asks " is it possible that GOD leaves an ache in my soul to remind me that this is not my home. Does HE leave that tinge there to impassion me to tell others about that hope?"
I keep contemplating why GOD would allow me to lose two babies in 5 months.Why He would allow such pain? I know we are not promised a "safe life". We are not promised to always be on the mountain top. But we are promised by the Creator of the universe that Joy will come in the morning. My morning want be on this earth. But my Joy will be made complete the day I meet Jesus face to face. You see, this is not our home. And praise GOD that I have a Savior that loves me enough to go and prepare a place for me.(John14:2-3) And will one day come again to take me home to HIM and my two babies. She says " This is our blessed hope: that we are HIS and will someday spend eternity with HIM. Until then, we are strangers and foreigners, left with scars and limps, and all the other subtle reminders of that sweet truth: we are not home."
C.S Lewis says "If I find myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." Ive never felt so different and so out of place and so loved all at the same time.But I know now its GOD reminding me that this is not my home. So now when my days feel like a battle and I'm feeling the effects of my scars i will be reminded that this is not my home.
I cannot fathom whats waiting for me in heaven but i so look forward to finding out.
Friday, February 24, 2012
Wondering through the wilderness of motherhood
Have you ever wondered what the children of Israel felt like when they were wondering through the wilderness? I feel like that's kind of how my life is right now. I'm wondering through the life of being a mom just trying to survive each day. (sometimes each hour with my testy and clingy 2 year old). I know I'm a child of GOD, just like Israel knew they were God's chosen people. I know where I need to be and I even know how to get there. Just like Moses knew how to lead the way. And my heart really wants to change these sins that GOD has convicted me of. But it seems so hard to get there. The harder I try the more I feel like satan pushes against me.
A few months ago GOD convicted me of sin that I didn't even realize was there. I lack self control and patience where my children are concerned. I let frustration get the best of me. I yell at the boys and fail to discipline them the way GOD says I should. What better way to destroy your relationship with your children? I cant teach them self control and patience if I don't posses those characteristics myself. I know that by constantly being in God's word and praying continually GOD can change this. But that's my other problem. I feel stuck. I go to church and hear God's word and its convicting and uplifting. And I know how I can apply that to my life. I love to worship HIM and have those moments where I feel like its just me and GOD. But then I get home and life slaps me in the face. I have time to read and study my Bible. I'm not going to use that excuse. I just don't sometimes. And I'm not sure why. Laziness? Lack of discipline maybe? I guess it comes down to not honoring and adoring HIM like I should. Life does get in the way. And it doesn't have to be bad stuff either. Motherhood can even get in the way of my relationship with GOD. That's why GOD needs to be FIRST priority and everything else will fall into place. GOD never called us to an easy life. I believe once you are saved life in general can get harded. Because satan wants to lead us astray and he will use whatever he can to do that. Being to busy with things of this world is the main distractions satan uses against most of us. I not only need to make time everyday to read, study, and pray but it needs to be a part of me and what I do every hour of every day. its not easy.But its very possible. I want to enjoy everyday and not just survive it.
Even when I feel like I'm wondering through the desert and everyday seems like a struggle I know I need to sit in the presence of GOD ALMIGHTY and HE will carry me through. I just need to let HIM do it.
A few months ago GOD convicted me of sin that I didn't even realize was there. I lack self control and patience where my children are concerned. I let frustration get the best of me. I yell at the boys and fail to discipline them the way GOD says I should. What better way to destroy your relationship with your children? I cant teach them self control and patience if I don't posses those characteristics myself. I know that by constantly being in God's word and praying continually GOD can change this. But that's my other problem. I feel stuck. I go to church and hear God's word and its convicting and uplifting. And I know how I can apply that to my life. I love to worship HIM and have those moments where I feel like its just me and GOD. But then I get home and life slaps me in the face. I have time to read and study my Bible. I'm not going to use that excuse. I just don't sometimes. And I'm not sure why. Laziness? Lack of discipline maybe? I guess it comes down to not honoring and adoring HIM like I should. Life does get in the way. And it doesn't have to be bad stuff either. Motherhood can even get in the way of my relationship with GOD. That's why GOD needs to be FIRST priority and everything else will fall into place. GOD never called us to an easy life. I believe once you are saved life in general can get harded. Because satan wants to lead us astray and he will use whatever he can to do that. Being to busy with things of this world is the main distractions satan uses against most of us. I not only need to make time everyday to read, study, and pray but it needs to be a part of me and what I do every hour of every day. its not easy.But its very possible. I want to enjoy everyday and not just survive it.
Even when I feel like I'm wondering through the desert and everyday seems like a struggle I know I need to sit in the presence of GOD ALMIGHTY and HE will carry me through. I just need to let HIM do it.
Monday, January 23, 2012
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Thursday, January 12, 2012
God loves even me!
Did you know Amos (wrote the book of Amos) was a sheep breeder? Glamorous job huh? Not only did he herd and breed sheep he also took care of sycamore figs. By our standards today that would have been a "low man on totum pole" kind of job. Back then it was a very necessary job. The more sheep you have the more wool and meat you have. Both were very important. God took Amos and used him to prophesy against Israel at that time. Amos was no one special. Just an ordinary man doing an ordinary monotonous job. But one extraordinary thing that Amos did was obey GOD. God said "go" and Amos went. Amos was very bold. Almost the whole book of Amos is him prophesying against Israel.God was having no more pity with Israel. And Amos had to be the one to tell them what was going to happen. That was a huge responsibility for Amos. When Amaziah the priest heard what he was doing he told Amos to go somewhere else and never prophesy there anymore. But do you know what Amos did. He didn't claim to be anyone special. Here's what he said.(ch 7 vs.14 &15) I was not a prophet or the son of a prophet rather I was a herdsman and I took care of sycamore figs. But the LORD took me from following the flock and said to me " Go, prophesy to My people Israel". I have alot of respect for Amos. He wasn't anyone special and even after he did this extraordinary thing he was still very humble.
When I read all of this about Amos it made me realize that God can use even me. Ive known this before but its nice to be reminded every once in a while. As a stay at home mom my job is very monotonous and not glamorous at all.I earn no money and am usually in my pj's all day no shower, and no make up on. And as a mom (especially with small children) you don't feel like your able to do a whole lot of work for God and your church. I don't get to do near as much stuff as i used to.Most mission trips are out and youth trips are out. I do love to teach Sunday school and sing in the choir. (although choir practice is usually a circus cause I'm up every 3 minutes chasing the boys down. All the precious people that are in the choir are so patient and loving about our little charades lol) The point is i am no one special. There may not be a whole lot of people that I can reach for Christ.But you know what i have learned over the last few months? That GOD gave me two special boys to love and to train them up in a way that is pleasing to GOD. That they might become men after Gods own heart.And they may be able to reach hundreds of people. And love people the way that Christ loves us. And my other job is to love and respect my husband. I'm not anyone special but those are two very important special jobs that are my responsibility to fulfill. That is what GOD ask me to do and that is what I will do Sometimes I do a terrible job of fulfilling that responsibility But I like to go to this verse to help me remember what i need to be doing..Deuteronomy 6:4-8 gives us one of the greatest commandments.Love the Lord GOD with all your heart all your soul and with all your strength.These words I am giving to you today are to be on your heart.Repeat them to your children.... So especially to all of you moms. Remember that God can and wants to use you. It may not be anything "big and glamorous" in other peoples eyes. But these commandments are some of the greatest in the whole Bible. God doesn't ask us to be special extraordinary or even successful. He ask us to be obedient. And that's what we should strive for.
When I read all of this about Amos it made me realize that God can use even me. Ive known this before but its nice to be reminded every once in a while. As a stay at home mom my job is very monotonous and not glamorous at all.I earn no money and am usually in my pj's all day no shower, and no make up on. And as a mom (especially with small children) you don't feel like your able to do a whole lot of work for God and your church. I don't get to do near as much stuff as i used to.Most mission trips are out and youth trips are out. I do love to teach Sunday school and sing in the choir. (although choir practice is usually a circus cause I'm up every 3 minutes chasing the boys down. All the precious people that are in the choir are so patient and loving about our little charades lol) The point is i am no one special. There may not be a whole lot of people that I can reach for Christ.But you know what i have learned over the last few months? That GOD gave me two special boys to love and to train them up in a way that is pleasing to GOD. That they might become men after Gods own heart.And they may be able to reach hundreds of people. And love people the way that Christ loves us. And my other job is to love and respect my husband. I'm not anyone special but those are two very important special jobs that are my responsibility to fulfill. That is what GOD ask me to do and that is what I will do Sometimes I do a terrible job of fulfilling that responsibility But I like to go to this verse to help me remember what i need to be doing..Deuteronomy 6:4-8 gives us one of the greatest commandments.Love the Lord GOD with all your heart all your soul and with all your strength.These words I am giving to you today are to be on your heart.Repeat them to your children.... So especially to all of you moms. Remember that God can and wants to use you. It may not be anything "big and glamorous" in other peoples eyes. But these commandments are some of the greatest in the whole Bible. God doesn't ask us to be special extraordinary or even successful. He ask us to be obedient. And that's what we should strive for.
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