Venting for a bit

As a stay at home mom i feel like people are watching every move i make. Maybe waiting for me to fail or wondering why i do what i do. i don't know.Some days i feel like I've done a great job with the boys, other days i feel like a failure.i really don't want to admit it but here it goes. its been a little tough this past year.Isaac has needed a good bit of help.and i have gotten really frustrated at times. Isaac still cant communicate with us.He cant tell you what he wants, he cant even point and grunt at what he wants.some times i know what he wants other times i just have to throw my hands up.Its hard watching your child cry and you cant even figure out what it is he wants.Alot of nights (here lately in particular)he wakes up screaming and i have know idea what to do.But Isaac has come a long way and I know he will get there its just going to take time. God has brought us down this path for a reason and i wouldn't change it for anything.even on the hard days. This past year has taught me more patience. But sometimes I get tired of being patient.I just want to get to where we want to be. But then I remember its not about me or even my family. Its about GOD and bringing glory to HIS name. This post may not do that but I'm just being honest about where I am today.I do want what GOD has in store for us. Because I know its best.And "GOD's BEST" doesn't mean everything wonderful. A friend of mine says that "God's best for JESUS was dying on  a cross."I'll take what GOD desires for me to have and try to bring glory to HIS name. I haven't always done this and I'm sure  Iwill fail at it in the future.But as Christians it is our job.I'm gonna close this post with a paragraph from the book Radical.  "He created human beings, not only to enjoy his grace in a relationship with Him, but also to extend HIS glory to the ends of the earth.Enjoy HIS grace and extend HIS glory.This is the twofold purpose behind the creation of the human race.